The Deeper Meaning of Liff by Douglas Adams

Author:Douglas Adams
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9780307238740
Publisher: Crown Publishing Group
Published: 2005-04-26T04:00:00+00:00

T

Tabley Superior (TAB-lee soo-PEER-ee-er) n.

The look directed at you in a theater bar during the interval by people who’ve already got their drinks.

Tampa (TAM-pah) n.

The sound of a rubber eraser coming to rest after dropping off a desk in a very quiet room.

Tananarive (TAN-an-ar-ighv) vb.

To announce your entrance by falling over the trash can in the drive.

Tanvats (TAN-vats) pl. n.

Disturbing things that the previous owners of your house have left in the cellar.

Tarabulus (ta-RAB-ew-lus) n.

The geometrical figure which describes the “Ban the Bomb” sign or a car steering wheel.

Taroom (ta-ROOM) vb.

To make loud noises during the night to let the burglars know you are in.

Teigngrace (TAYN-grays) n.

The belief that a Devon cream tea is not going to make you feel sick after you’ve eaten it.

Tew (TEW) n.

The tuft of hair that grows between a man’s eyebrows.

Tewel (TEW-ul) n.

The little brass latch that fastens the front wall of a doll’s house.

Throcking (THROK-ing) ptcpl. vb.

The action of continually pushing down the lever on a pop-up toaster in the hope that you will thereby get it to understand that you want it to toast something.

Throckmorton (throk-MOR-ton) n.

The soul of a departed madman: one of those now known to inhabit the timing mechanisms of pop-up toasters.

Thrumster (THRUM-ster) n.

The irritating man next to you at a concert who thinks he’s the conductor.

Thrupp (THRUP) vb.

To hold a ruler on one end of a desk and make the other end go bbddbbddbbrrbrrrrddrr.

Thurnby (THERN-bee) n.

A rucked-up edge of carpet or linoleum that everyone says someone will trip over and break a leg unless it gets fixed. After a year or two someone trips over it and breaks a leg.

Tibshelf (TIB-shelf) n.

Criss-cross wooden construction hung on a wall in a teenage girl’s bedroom, which is covered with glass Bambis and poodles, matching pigs and porcelain ponies in various postures.

Tidpit (TID-pit) n.

The corner of a toenail from which satisfying little black spots may be sprung.

Tillicoultry (TIL-ee-KOOL-tree) n.

The man-to-man chumminess adopted by an employer as a prelude to telling an employee that he’s going to have to let him go.

Timble (TIM-bul) vb.

(Of small nasty children) To fall over very gently, look around to see who’s about and then yell blue murder.

Tincleton (TINK-ul-tn) n.

A man who amuses himself in your lavatory by pulling the chain in mid-pee and then seeing if he can finish before the flush does.

Tingewick (TINJ-wik) n.

The first, sleepy morning stirrings of the penis.

Tingrith (TIN-grith) n.

The feeling of silver paper against your fillings.

Tockholes (TOK-hohlz) pl.n.

The tiny meaningless perforations which infest brogues.

Todber (TOD-ber) n.

One whose idea of a good time is to stand behind his front hedge and give surly nods to people he doesn’t know.

Todding (TODD-ing) vb.

The business of talking amicably and aimlessly to your local bartender.

Tolob (TOL-ob) n.

A crease or fold in an underblanket, the removal of which involves getting out of bed and largely remaking it.

Tolstachaolais (TOL-stakh-ah-ow-ligh-EES.) phr.

*6

What the police in Leith require you to say in order to prove that you are not drunk.

Tomatin (TOM-a-tin) n.

The chemical from which canned tomato soup is made.

Tonypandy (TOH-nee-PAN-dee) n.

The voice used by presenters on children’s television programs.

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